Marley has cancer and is being treated with Cannabis oil to good results
Backwaters by night
an you believe it finally, it is time for a holiday! It is unreal. The brain gets so used to routine and pattern. Until you are all packed and finally slam your door shut, turn the key in your door and head for the airport, it still is sinking in. Hop skip flights and city lights take off and land, the weight of the smog lifts from your chest and winter has changed to a pleasant 23 degrees. Coconut trees everywhere and people pulling in fishing nets. Dump bags in a tent and park yourself on a hammock. You introduce yourself, you try to remember all the names, but then you remember who does what for a living and which city they come from and if they can stand up yet while surfing and soon you are all glowing under the white shade where you eat the fish curry, rice and papad staple with changing vegetables everyday. At night the breeze is stronger and the round lamps light up and everything is somehow more beautiful. The stars are all visible, there is no smog. The tents are just zipped shut there is no one to steal your stuff. The people are just here, there's no places to rush to for holiday variety in dinner or lunch, we sit on this nice big wooden table and by the end of the trip we've shared eighteen meals together.
Thank you life, full moon on the Arabian Sea. 2nd January 2018
So many days spent alone, one forgets what it feels like to be new, to be reintroduced to the world. Quietly watching the sun set over the sea and watch the colours change from blue to yellow to orange to purple pink red and then navy blue into black. I'm no islander or tropical native but I imagine it takes distance to appreciate this beauty as well. Would one get caught in the same patterns if one lived here?
People are essentially the same, we all feel the same feelings of love, belonging, loneliness, fear and there is goodness in all of us. It is oversimplifying but a good anti anxiety strategy when meeting people in a community setting. A good place to be at, relaxed and easy speaking under the stars.
It's all about the mind
It's not easy for anyone to see where they have gone wrong. But that's where solitude rewards you if you are ready for the reaping. We try to do so many things. Fragile. Keeping it together at so many levels that sometimes one bad concept becomes a habit and before you know it ten years have gone by and finally you see that you needn't be this way anymore. It's not necessary - in fact it's not even a habit invented by you. It was collected from childhood and just because somebody planted a sense of fear and survival in you, you feel it's your duty to carry it forward. Your legacy?
I have seen panic and I have seen deep sadness and volatile anger and I suppose somewhere they have become pillars of existence - like a place you have visited and now when you close your eyes you know exactly where the turns are and what the gate looks like. My anger is least visited and sadness a bit more and panic the most.
Then you meet people and they are built on different experiences and their reactions to the same situation are different. Some run from a wave, some go straight into it and battle it, some watch from way back over there where the waves cant touch you, others glide and ride it effortlessly.
Just from this one can learn so much. There isn't even a need to speak and days have gone by without a sentence being uttered.
It's also about the body
One can do as much visualisation and meditation but when you have that one second to switch from lying on the board to paddling like hell while timing yourself to the wave and then another few microseconds to get up stand up it is the body and the mind - and a few scratches await you if you hug the board for dear life.
The only picture I could get of the bioluminescent algae rich backwaters on my phone. So sad that I decided to not carry my camera 🙁 But Sid the stud ( we will get in to why he is a stud a little later) was taking some nice pictures with long exposure and loads of patience and a tripod and I have asked him if I can post some here and here they are!
"At night the breeze is stronger and the round lamps light up and everything is somehow more beautiful."
Now I can tell you, Sid is a stud because he was volunteering at the local school teaching all these kids BREAK DANCE. And we got to see the final showdown and the girls won!
Meeting new people and singing into the night around the bonfire surrounded by water
It's the same old songs and it's also some new songs with people you have just met. Such a great way to connect and hang out. I have somehow been afraid to practise guitar (!) I know, the narrative in my head was that I will never be good enough at it so might as well not try (!) It's ridiculous when I think about it now. I think surfing helped. It's almost as, if you do something more scary then the other things seem less scary - for e.g. singing high notes vs drowning in the ocean. What is more scary?
© 2018 SAMIA SINGH